Despite.Org – Despise Everything!
Posts tagged Array
Some Words of Wisdom
Jul 24th
1. A day without sunshine is night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
9. Support bacteria. They’re the only culture some people have.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
11. Change is inevitable , except from vending machines.
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
13. How many of you believe in psychokinesis? Raise my hand.
14. OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
15. When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, ‘What the heck happened?’
22. Just remember — if the world didn’t suck, we would all fall off..
23. Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
24. Life isn’t like a box of chocolates. It’s more like a jar of jalapeños. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
-Dan
Tags: Anger, Array, Bad Memory, Box Of Chocolates, Butt, Cheese, Clear Conscience, Comedy, Eagles, Early Bird, Fingers, Jet Engines, Laziness, Misc., Nobody Cares, Not Rated, Psychics, Sponges, Support Bacteria, Vending Machines, Weasels, What The Heck, Words Of Wisdom, Worm
Heinz Field Steelers Fan Blitz 2008
Apr 27th
This weekend we went to Pittsburgh for the Fan Blitz 2008 at Heinz Field. You can view the pictures we took at our picture gallery (Heinz Field Steelers Fan Blitz 2008). Here is a pic of one of the entrances (click on images to enlarge):
This next pic is of the Kids and I. I am on the left obviously.
This was a really cool day. I am not sure the kids enjoyed it as much as I but it was fun non the less. One of these days when we have some extra cash, we are hitting this stadium to watch a Steelers Home game and or heading over to the Cleveland Browns stadium to watch the Browns get womped by the Steelers on the road game. Either way, its gonna cost some cash $$$$.
Tags: Array, Blitz, Boring, Cleveland Browns, Cleveland Browns Stadium, Extra Cash, General, Great, Heinz Field, Home Game, Images, Kids Click, Kids Images, My Mood, Not Rated, One Of These Days, Personal Blog, Picture Gallery, Rated, Road Game, Ruger, Sports, Steelers Fan
Pisscopailians
Apr 21st
Three little boys were concerned
because they couldn’t get anyone to play with them.
They decided it was because they had not been baptized
and didn’t go to Sunday School .
So they went to the nearest Church.
But, only the Janitor was there .
One little boy said,
“We need to be baptized
because no one will come out and play with us.
Will you baptize us?”
“Sure,” said the Janitor.
He took them into the bathroom
and dunked their little heads in the toilet bowl,
Then he said, “You are now baptized!”
When they got outside,
one of them asked,
“What religion do you think we are?”
the oldest one said,
“We’re not Kathlick, because they pour the water on you.”
“We’re not Babtis, because they dunk all of you in the water.”
“We’re not Methdiss, because they just sprinkle water on you.”
The littlest one said,
“Didn’t you smell that water?!”
They all joined in asking,
“Yeah! What do you think that means?”
“I think it means we’re Pisscopailians.”
Tags: Array, Comedy, Janitor, Jokes, Little Boys, Not Rated, One At A Time, Pisscopailians, religion, Sunday School, Toilet Bowl
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