Rated: G
Oxymoron
Feb 11th
My Dad sent me this, not sure where he got it from but it speaks the truth:
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?
Why is it called “after dark” when it really is “after light”?
Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” make the unexpected expected?
If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
Why is bra singular and panties plural?
Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ?
-Danny
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
Loading ...Age before Technology
Feb 3rd
TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930’s 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and 70’s!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and or drank while they carried us.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.
Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitch-hiking.
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because
WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Playstations, Nintendo’s, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms……….WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!
And YOU are one of them! CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.
While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
Publisher Unknown?
-Dan
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5) Loading ...
North Carolina
Sep 7th
Well, we made it. We arrived in North Carolina around 9:30PM last night. We were beat after driving straight through. Tomorrow or the next day I’ll post some pictures of us. The Ocean is pretty choppy due to Hanna passing over, but that just makes it more fun.
The house that we are staying in is HUGE. The humidity down here has to be one hundred percent. You step ourside and you immediatley start sweating. Its great!! Theres a hot tub here that my family is using as I type this. The only thing is all the liqour stores are closed on Sunday so we have to wait until tomorrow to but some happy juice.
I’ll post pics tomorrow…
-Dan
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Hercules
Mar 19th
Hercules: The World’s Biggest Dog Ever According to Guinness World Records. Hercules was recently awarded the honorable distinction of World’s Biggest Dog by Guinness World Records. Hercules is an English Mastiff who has a 38-inch neck and weighs 282 pounds. With “paws the size of softballs” (reports the Boston Herald), the three-year-old monster is far larger and heavier than his breed’s standard 200lb. limit. Hercules’ owner Mr. Flynn says that Hercules weight is natural and not induced by a bizarre diet: “I fed him normal food and he just “grew”… and grew and grew and grew.
-Ruger
(1 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5) Loading ...You know your old when…
Mar 10th
You know your old when in…
1977 : Long hair
2007 : Longing for hair
1977 : KEG
2007: EKG
1977 : Acid rock 
2007 : Acid reflux 
1977 : Moving to California because it’s cool 
2007 : Moving to Arizona because it’s warm 
1977 : Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor 
2007: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1977 : Seeds and stems 
2007 : Roughage 
1977 : Hoping for a BMW 
(ya, this looks like a 1977 beamer alright…)
2007: Hoping for a BM
1977 : Going to a new, hip joint 
2007 : Receiving a new hip joint 
1977 : Rolling Stones 
2007: Kidney Stones 
1977 : Screw the system 
2007: Upgrade the system 
1977 : Disco 
2007: Costco 
1977 : Parents begging you to get your hair cut 
2007: Kids begging to get heads shaved 
1977 : Passing the drivers’ test 
2007: Passing the vision test 
1977 : Whatever 
2007: Depends 
Just in case you weren’t feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year’s incoming freshmen.
Here’s this year’s list:
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1989.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up. 
Their lifetime has always included AIDS. 
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic. 
The CD was introduced the year they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show. 
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave. 
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws. 
They can’t imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don’t know who Mork was or where he was from. 
They never heard: “Where’s the Beef?”, “I’d walk a mile for a Camel”, or “de plane, Boss, de plane.”
They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is. 
McDonald’s never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don’t have a clue how to use a typewriter. 
Do you feel old yet? Notice the larger type, that’s for those of you who have trouble reading…
-Ruger
(1 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5) Loading ...
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